Should You Engage in a Relationship While in College?

Love is a beautiful thing. People fall in love in very mysterious ways, especially in colleges. While it took me a couple of months to master all the lecture halls in the university, it only took two weeks for my friend to find a boyfriend. You might be wondering but, yes, it was that fast.

People would think that I have a weakness in connecting with others, but I prefer taking my time to know people well. To know a person well, you need to take your time, which cannot happen within a week.

Being in college means you have the freedom to try things you couldn't do at home. No one is there to control you on the decisions you make. Many young boys and girls try new things like dating, partying, drinking, late nights outs, or even creating "squads." 

While a campus student has many challenges, having a healthy relationship is one of the greatest. Most college relationships do not last. Some last as long as one semester, others last longer but don't go past graduation, while a few make it past college life.

Before I give you some reasons why most campus relationships exist, I will admit that I have had a  relationship that failed and  am yet to finish college. I'm still figuring out whether I was the one with a problem or my then-partner's problem. But anyway.

Here are 7 reasons why most college relationships never last.

1. College men are boys, and girls are just girls.

You might wonder how this leads to relationships failure. It happens in this sense; campus students are just two adults with adolescent minds. Imagine if they fall in love, their primary reason would mostly be the purpose of experimenting things. Most men want to be boys; they want to date every girl they come across without commitments. On the other hand, some girls are arrogant "slay queens" who don't care about the details of men they engage with, but they are after fancy gifts, expensive dates, etc., practically, it is just people who are maturing in love, and such relationships cannot go far.

2. Most relationships are built on friends with benefits grounds.

Some of the relationships are hookups with no solid grounds. Some relationships develop out of nowhere. For instance, you might find your roommate has a boyfriend, and that boyfriend has his friend; this means you can easily interact and connect with that friend. As a result, you will find another relationship has developed. There is no way you expect such a relationship developed on merit to last, it will just be for fun

3. Most college relationships involve two people.

Look at it this way; the two lovers are individuals who have decided to start a life that no family member or even a close relative knows about. The affair is a secret, and the two partners could only be testing whether things can work out well for them. If something wouldn't work out, it means one partner can choose to walk out bringing the relationship to an end.

4. Financial burdens 

Campus guys are generally broke, except for the few guys from privileged families or those with side hustles. You will find most of the campus fellas try to compromise their finances to treat their partners nicely while they're not supposed to. In many cases, you will find girls expecting their boyfriends to fund their needs as if they are their sponsors or something. Here you will start seeing the relationship sinking because at one point one will get tired of taking care of another person who also depends on their parents. 

5. Insecurities and jealousy

Some of the relationships end because of jealousy. For some people, once they become lovers, they start becoming insecure and possessive in that they want to know every detail of the things their partners do. You find others making conclusions of things they hear without knowing the validity of such information. This type of behavior will make an innocent person pull away from the relationship for his/her peace.

6. Graduation is a killer of campus relationships.

Most of the relationships that develop during college life are of people from different regions. After graduation, lovers from other regione will have to deal with long-distance connections that are hard to manage with the current situations. On completing studies, individuals also begin a new chapter, and not unless lovers were prepared for it, their love story comes to an end.

7. Some relationships need you to read into things.

Have you ever liked someone and they didn't reciprocate the feeling? Well, some of us have experienced this. You find a person who is nice to you but isn't interested in a relationship with you. A person may even take you for dates and give you all the excellent treatments you need; without a clear statement of their intentions, you might think they are interested in you. You will have yourself to blame when they state the opposite of your expectations once confronted.

In conclusion, I am not writing all these to make you question your decisions or to scare you from finding your soulmate in college. Several admirable relationships started while in college and are doing well still. 

Your relationship could have failed, but at least you two shared personal growth and learned several things.